Saturday, December 24, 2011

Let Me Hold Your Hand



I know what you're thinking, because I'm thinking the same thing... What took you so long? I have been on a hiatus to say the least, and while I haven't stopped writing, I have gotten out of my writing "groove" so to speak. So this is me getting my "groove" back.

This post was inspired by my training class at work, I recently shared some poetry with them and was explaining how I was asked to write a poem for a lady about the love she has for her significant other and how while I was intrigued by the idea, I had no idea on where to begin or how to convey her feelings for a man that I know nothing about. So, naturally I've been giving her the run-around about when the poem is going to be finished because one, I haven't begun and two its hard to write a poem when all I have to go off of is his blue eyes and her undying love. Basically, I'm trying to make sure the poem doesn't suck because I have a reputation to uphold, even if it is a small reputation. Anyway, as I began writing this piece on like Sunday or Monday of this past week, I thought about how a simple act of holding hands could mean so much, which brings me back to my training class. One of the ladies said something to the effect of we do a lot of things with people, but we don't hold hands with everyone. Which I would say is true. I can't begin to think of the last time I held someone's hand that wasn't my son or a family member or someone whom I really meant to hold their hand. In some ways holding hands is even more intimate than having intercourse with someone.
There are so many different emotions that go along with holding hands from being scared and needing to feel safe and secure, to being made to feel wanted by your loved one. Which brings me back to the poem for this lady (I know I'm going the extreme seneic route but its been a while since I've been here) I want the poem to convey all of the feelings she wants me to convey through the act of holding hands. I just feel this would be an awesome love poem so with that said, I began writing this like Sunday or Monday and by no means is it finished and it didn't even come out the way I wanted it to. I can't decide if this is a poem or lyrics to a song (Re:Evolution anyone?)

So I will share what I have because I have been meaning to blog for the longest time, hope you all enjoy and leave some feedback and/or comment and thanks for reading, I really appreciate you.

It's been a while,
since we had this time to talk,
to think, to say,
the things we really mean to say

It's been a while,
I remember the day infatuation
faded away
And we were left staring
At the truth of one another,
and there was nothing left to say,
but baby let me hold your hand

Stand the test of time with you,
together we can shine if you,
just let me hold your hand

These questions that I ask of you,
are merely a reflection of who you push me to be,
hopefully I push you too,
out of this plane,
so that we finally learn
we can fly,

But if we should fall
I promise,
I'll be there to hold your hand,
the entire way to the ground,

I'll be grounded when you need me to be,
a silly dreamer if you want that of me,
I'm not asking that you fall for me
I'm simply asking that you
let me hold your hand,

When life's disappointments are too much for me
or nothing goes how it's supposed to be
and when I'm not strong enough
to stand

Baby won't you let me hold your hand
I like how you're not impressed so easily
and the fresh perspective of life you see

But one thing I want you to understand,
we weren't meant to be alone
so let me hold your hand.

Friday, July 22, 2011

The Manifesto of Love




I declare that this manifesto is my profession of the act of love and how it influences my everyday life so those I interact with will have some idea of where my communication efforts come from and how it impacts my train of thought

1) God is Love:
  
2) Love has no timetable nor time limit:
    There is not a set time love happens and/or ends. Love just is. Love is the moment when you care about another person's well being not just because  of how it affects you but more importantly how you can help this person(s) to get better, to be better. Love does not care if you've known this person(s) since you were children or just met them yesterday or an hour ago. When love hits you, it is undeniable and inescapable.

3) Love is not (just) a feeling:
    The love I'm speaking of here is not the physical "I love him or her because they do things for me or get things for me or give me things." This love is more than just a feeling. Its the sun rises and sunsets, summer thunderstorms. This love is a living metaphor. Loving like this makes you better, makes those around you better, makes life more peaceful and fulfilling.

4) Love is a language, a way of life:
    We can choose to live a life of love. To begin, all we have to do is simply desire to live more lovingly. Once the desire is burning inside of us we must take action to begin the journey. The first step of this journey is to learn the love language. By this I mean learn to speak to everything in creation with love. When we do this what we will find is that we are doing more listening and less talking, more thinking and less impulsive acting. We will be more conscious of our word choices, which will make the things we say more meaningful. This does not mean that we only say things people want to hear. When we are living a life of love and speaking a love language, love is felt even when we're having differences with our loved ones and our enemies.

5) Love is the truth:
    Pure and unadulterated, love is the truth. The truth is never easy to find and never finite, as is the same with love, the commonality between the two is that when they are pure, we never question their absolute existence.

6) Love is never easy:
    Love is work. Love doesn't just happen, love is the culmination of efforts to gain an understanding and appreciation for someone. We work openly and wholeheartedly to learn those we are intrigued by and infatuated with, therefore, we are working towards loving that person.

7) Saying "I Love You" means something:
    With that said, we must learn the meaning of the phrase and how to accept the phrase. "I Love You" means more and less than we want it to mean. In a romantic scenario it means "I'm committed to maintaining and building this foundation we've started called a relationship." It does not mean "I will always agree with you or your thoughts, but I will respect them and honor their validity." It does not mean that we will be together forever but we will be better for knowing one another. In life it means "I care for your well being and I will do my best to be my best so that you can be your best and we can have a positive impact on our environment." It does not mean that we won't ever argue or disagree but when we do I won't berate or degrade you emotionally, physically or mentally.

8) There's no wrong way to love, except selfishly:
    We should strive to never love selfishly or for our own personal gains. Love should be our gift to the Universe for allowing us to be. Love should not be used to torment or degrade others. We never use love as a means to control another person, love should flow as freely through us as the air we breathe.

9) Love is (in) all things:
    If we look deep enough, we will find love. It is all around us in everything from (most of) the food we eat to (most of) the music we listen to. So take some time each day and feel the love.

10) Love is faith:
      Love never questions its authenticity, not saying that everyone loves us perfectly but we must know when a person is loving us to the best of their ability and when we're loving to the best of ours. If it doesn't feel like love it most likely isn't.

11) Love is (not) blind:
      Love isn't blind it just doesn't perceive things the same way we perceive them. So just because you can't see how love is working doesn't mean it isn't working.

12) Love yourself:
      Love feeds off of itself so in order for us to love more fully and more effectively we must learn to love ourselves. This is no easy task with all of the negativity that surrounds us, but with work it can be accomplished.

These are just some of the things that I try to remember in my daily life and I'm not saying they are set in stone or that I do each one perfectly, I just strive to do this everyday and I have days when I get there and days when I don't. The main thing though is that I attempt to be a better person each and every day and that to me is what makes the difference. Enjoy.
Peace J


Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Love in the 4th Person

This post came to me after looking at some old poems and some friends Facebook pages. (No I wasn't cyber stalking, this time lol) but it reminded me that when we love for selfish reasons, we can not accept selfless love. The poem that I'm going to post was written probably six years ago. Earlier today I wrote an apology on my FB page that said "I apologize for loving you selfishly, I thought it was selflessly, its funny how similar the two are." That was intended for a certain person but she doesn't believe it and I can't make her. Maybe I should have said it to her directly but I thought its better served for everyone to see because I can think of multiple times where I have loved selfishly under the guise of unconditional love. Hope you guys enjoy this piece as I've never read it for anyone or shared it with anyone. Oh and I also got some help from some co-workers of mine from my Hartford days. Anyway here goes;

She kissed me with the same betrayal as Judas did Christ
Lacking serendipity to escape being deceived twice
She penetrated my mind like the crown of thorns penetrated His head
She pierced my side, feet and hands like the nails they used to
Hold Him to the cross

She crucified me
Said her heart was broken
and living wasn't an option

I opted to stay up, not able to sleep
Something she said plays on my mind
Like a song on repeat

I didn't see the signs
I knew she was heartbroken
Still in love with the one she said kept her breathless
He said she kept him breathless
Touched his mind, body, spirit

They connected from the mind,
To the body, and
Soul mates they were

And here I was in the middle
Three's a crowd, not company
What's comforting is
I want her to be happy

But not with him

She said she loved me unconditionally
Except for the fact that we were raised differently
I told her I was raised to see sunrises and sunshine
But to know the rain was never too far behind

So I had a melancholy outlook on love
She said she had the same outlook on life
But we gelled together like a Thelonious Monk song
Round Bout Midnight

So far off time
But perfectly in time
We were perfectly in line
For the next note
The next moment in time that's imperfect



Thursday, May 26, 2011

Re: Evolution of Love

I'm back and even though I haven't posted in weeks it feels good to be back. I'm working on a new poetry project entitled The Re:Evolution of Love. Ever since I completed my first project Morning Service I wanted to do an album of love poems and songs. This is what the new project is going to be. But putting it together has been more eye opening than I thought. First I was just going to take some of the poems about love that I already had and make backing music to them but then I got the idea to make sections, three in total Eros, Philia, and Agape. Each set of poems within the section will describe the feeling of the particular type of love. As I was/am going through my archives I am finding things out about each type of love that I had not known. I'm also finding out things about me that I didn't know. To say the least this project is a struggle, from finding music that is moving to writing new material I'm finding it difficult to get it out, but I know its in there. So I began to look inside myself and my surroundings to see what the problem is.
 This journey where ever it leads me, I feel like on the other side I'm going to be a changed poet, a changed person and have a renewed spirit.

I'm beginning to no longer believe in the notion of love as it pertains to romantic relationships. I have no one to blame but myself for letting it get to this point. Its easy to fall into infatuation with some one, its hard to love them and almost impossible to have that unconditional type of love for a person. I fooled myself into thinking I had achieved this for a person but that was before the "end" of our time together. I thought not caring was the same as loving unconditionally but I was wrong. Not caring in itself is self-sabotage to truly loving when you break down the reasons for not caring.

For me it was "well if it doesn't bother her to treat me this way, it doesn't bother me to act apathetic towards her" but what I really was saying was "I'm upset that you aren't loving me the way I want to be or deserve to be loved." I know a lot of times when people think of Eros they immediately think of physical, sensual, erotic, sexual love. In my opinion it also is selfish love meaning we give our love selfishly. For instance, "I love you because you do this or that for me, and if you stop doing those things I won't love you anymore." Its like we have to have a reason to give love, make it beneficial for us.

Now don't get me wrong I'm not saying this is a good or bad ideal, I'm just saying that it is. So, how do we transcend to loving more selflessly? This to me is partially what the Re:Evolution of love is about. Showing the different types of love, the different phases of love and the transcendence we all have inside of us to love differently. For me, I want the listeners of this project to feel like," yeah I've been there," but to also feel that after listening they have the power inside them to love differently, more effectively and most of all more fully.

Hopefully it won't take me too long to complete this project but I will make sure that you get your monies worth and hopefully it will be something to talk about that changes the way we think about love, loving and being loved.

Peace, J

  Love Poem #9 by jtruth

Monday, May 2, 2011

The Finishing Touch

As I try to get outside my thoughts and into an "artistic" state of mind, I began to think on the things I've started and haven't finished. The list is quite astonishing once I put it down on paper and it was in my face and no longer a figment of my imagination, so to speak. Its everything from unfinished poems to unfinished music, to unfinished job searches. Its pitiful as I look at this list. I never would consider myself a quitter, a procrastinator sure but never a quitter. Now I'm beginning to re-evaluate that thought. I know its never too late to finish the things that I have left undone and I'm going to do it. I thought I had more to write but I guess not so here's some music....



  Motivate by jtruth

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Highlight or Theory, That is the question

So I already wrote this once and because my computer sucks I lost everything I had. With that said, I'm going to keep this part short. Be on the lookout for my artist spotlight with Ms. Dani Cook poet, author, all-around awesome human being and also check out her album Dysfunctional Dysmemberment on either I-Tunes or Amazon (here). This poem was just finished last night thanks to a beautfiul spirit that inspired me. I'm not sure what I want to name this poem but I've narrowed it to either "Highlight" or "Theory" you all can let me know what you think and offer other suggestions. Here goes nothing.

There's something in your eyes
That makes me wanna know your mind
There's something in your mind
That makes me wanna know the time
And place best suited for this race to your heart

You know the one where
I'm wanting to win it over
You want to keep it from being broken

I know at times love gets lost in translation
Though I'm not saying I'm in love with you
But your words flow like water
Out of my mouth
And into existence

See I believe in you faithfully
While technically we haven't met
You've indoctrinated me
So I'll attest to your teachings

Just lie to me like you mean it
Tell me the truth like it will set me free
Let me belive, what I want to believe

Like I believe in your beautiful spirit
Your kind soul
That, smile that puts my whole world on hold
And even though we've never met

Our energies have crossed paths
And I'm a new being
But don't you dare ask me if I'm heaven-sent
And I won't ask if you're from there

You're too truthful to be human
Too humanly beautiful to be angelic
It must be the God in you
Because you know my heart so well

And although I've never physically been in your presence
Whenever I'm mentally in your presence
I feel connected

And the highlight of my day is when I
Step into my train of thought
And you just so happen to be there

One day I'll gather the courage to ask your name
And we can have this conversation in person
That sounds so good,
In theory


Hope you guys enjoy this. Thanks for viewing.

Peace

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Chain Letters and the Like

I know it has been quite a while since I've posted but I haven't had constant access to a computer and internet in said time. With that said, this latest poem was/is inspired by a chaing bbm (black berry messenger) that I received tonight. I won't put the message here but let's just say that my poem will explain almost every type of chain letter/email/text. So without further ado, here goes nothing.

I don't see how raising minimum wage in 2008 is going to help me
I mean inflation helps keep me knee deep in debt
So no matter how high minimum wage gets
I still can't afford that Phantom I seen on Trade and Tryon street
Much less alleiviate the stress I feel when creditors keep calling me trying to collect
They ain't getting no money

I ain't trying to get rich quick
I'm trying to get shit done in life
I'm trying to get shit done right now!
Time is money and I don't have much of either

Just a mouth full of ether
Lungs filled with S.A.R.S.
And blood that is lethal
To put it plainly, I'm sick

Not sick like Wolly Vinyl on the mic or
Not sick like CP Maze with metaphors
Sick like you get when you hear another child's body has been found
In a back alley way beaten and raped by a two-time
Convicted child molester

Or sick like you get when you played the lotto all week
Just to see the fifty bucks you spent on tickets
Go to somebody in Iowa, who just hit the jackpot for $450 million

Now all you can think about is how you can get away with robbing and armored truck
Because you just realized your college degree provides you just enough
Opportunity to be over-qualified for flipping fries
But not enough experience to get that $45,000 a year job that you were
Promised when you entered college

As you try and survive your BS nine to five
You also realize that your dreams come true
Through the passion you place and the faith you have in them

Not some dumb chain email that sells
"You've been visited by the wish fairy"
Send this to twenty people in thirty seconds
And the one you secretly love will suddenly realize
They love you, when you've really been held back by
This restraining order

Or the, "send this to 500 of your closest friends
And something amazing will happen to you
Twenty minutes after the 500th person finishes the last sentence
And passes it back to you

Or the, "number one through Z, in the first three
Pick your favorite colors and closest friends
Then pick your favorite month, followed by your favorite seasons
And make a wish

Then send this to eight people you don't know
Wait three days at whatever time you opened this email
AND SOMETHING WILL HAPPEN"

Or my favorite, if you delete this email
It means that YOU hate God
And He'll never forgive you for kicking Him out of your inbox.
Which makes sense because I know for a fact that
God checks His reply messages daily

So the next time you receive a message that says,
"THIS REALLY WORKS"
Do me a favor
Slap the shit out of your co-worker

Monday, February 14, 2011

A Valentine's Day Poem



I have to admit, I'm a sucker for pretty eyes and a pretty smile
But I'm a mess for a beautiful spirit
The total package and your sometimes wild side
Enhances the attraction
Yeah, I like my ladies a little feisty.
Crazy even.

I'm talking leaving bricks through windows
Because I was on the phone with my momma too long
I'm talking sleeping with one eye open
Because she jokingly said
She would cut ya balls off pa'tna, and
You know she doesn't play

I need to know you love me.
Write me a "love letter" out of newspaper clippings
That make me feel on top of the world, but also
Watch my back because
I don't know which hedge you will jump from behind

Girl you are fine,
The type of fine that makes heroine
Sound like a really good idea,
The kind of fine that makes you
Steal another poet's lines... Twice

Make me a believer,
A believer that my health would be in serious jeopardy
If I even thought about opening the door
For an old lady to pass through,
A believer that I best not pretend to ask the waitress
For another glass of water
Or find myself missing

And I know you cursed out my sister
Because you thought she was trying to get in my car
When I was just giving her a ride home.

But that's the type of love you give me
That real love,
That something I can feel love
Even if it is a knife to the arm
Or a frying pan to the back.

So baby don't worry,
I got your back
And that little three to five year bid
For "keeping it real" won't break us
Because I'm pretty sure
That no matter where I go
You'd find me...
And that kind of scares me

So I'll be there every visitation Saturday
Flowers in one hand, a shank in the other
Cause I wish a mother fucker would
Try to break up this good thing we have

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Morning Service

What's happening good people its been a minute, in any event I am excited to say that I am offering my first spoken word project, Morning Service available to you guys for FREE! You can get it here. So make sure you check it out and send me your comments.

Since this is a digital download I am going to do my album credits and Liner notes here for your viewing pleasure, especially for my music nerds, here goes nothing.

Intro - Produced by Kevin "24K" Wearren for Bottom Street Productions. All words by Kevin "24K" Wearren. Recorded at Bottom Street Studios, Southport, NC by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Mixed by Kevin Wearren

Writer's Block - Produced by Kevin "24K" Wearren for Bottom Street Productions. All words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Recorded at Bottom Street Studios, Southport, NC by Kevin Wearren. Mixed by Kevin Wearren.

A Poet's Dream - Produced by Kevin "24K" Wearren for Bottom Street Productions. All Words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Recorded at Bottom Street Studios, Southport, NC by Kevin Wearren. Mixed by Kevin Wearren.

Drunken Thoughts - Produced by Allen "Snake" Weaver for U.S.A. All words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Recorded at Bottom Street Studios, Southport, NC by Kevin Wearren. Mixed by Kevin Wearren.

Mama Said - Produced by Jamaal "J-Truth" Cowan for Bottom Street Productions. All Words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Recorded at Mall's Crib, Charlotte, NC by Jamaal Cowan. Mixed by Jamaal Cowan

For Symone - Produced by Kevin "24K" Wearren for Bottom Street Productions. All words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Recorded at Mall's Crib, Charlotte, NC by Jamaal Cowan. Mixed by Jamaal Cowan.

Communion - Produced by Kevin "24K" Wearren for Bottom Street Productions.

Preach Tonight - Produced by Kevin "24K" Wearren for Bottom Street Productions. All words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Recorded at Mall's Crib, Charlotte, NC by Jamaal Cowan. Mixed by Jamaal Cowan. Preach Tonight contains a sample from "The Preacher" as performed by Bobby Womack. I assume Mr. Womack wrote the song and I hope I don't get sued for this because I have no money and I'm giving this album away for free.

The Emergence - Produced by Jamaal "J-Truth" Cowan for Bottom Street Productions. All words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Recorded at Mall's Crib, Charlotte, NC by Jamaal Cowan. Mixed by Jamaal Cowan.

Whatever It Is - Produced by Kevin "24K" Wearren for Bottom Street Productions. All words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Recorded at Mall's Crib, Charlotte, NC by Jamaal Cowan. Mixed by Jamaal Cowan.

Tru Blue - Produced by Jamaal "J-Truth" Cowan for Bottom Street Productions.

Good Morning, Heartache - All words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan. Recorded at Mall's Crib, Charlotte, NC. Mixed by Jamaal Cowan.

Its Yours - Produced by Allen "Snake" Weaver for U.S.A. Words by Jamaal "Revolutionary J" Cowan, Allen "Snake" Weaver, Kevin "24K" Wearren and Jamaal "CJ" Byrd-Cowan. Recorded at Bottom Street Studios, Southport, NC. Revolutionary J hook recorded at Mall's Crib, Charlotte, NC. Mixed by Kevin Wearren and Allen Weaver, additional mixing by Jamaal Cowan.


Album cover designed by Kevin Wearren.
Insert designed by Jamaal Cowan, photo taken by Allen Weaver
(c) 2007 All Rights Reserved.

Thanks: First off thanks to God for all things being made possible. Thanks to my parents Howard and Betty for encouraging me and supporting me even when I didn't make the best decisions. Thanks to my big sister Aywanna for encouraging me, supporting me, housing me, being my advisor and even kicking my butt when I need it. Thanks to my big brother Drew for always having my back no matter what. Thanks to Kev for all of the hard work we put in to this and so much more music, we haven't even scraped the tip of the iceberg, but we know what we working on. Thanks to Hammer for giving me the title and executive producing this journey. Thanks to Al for allowing us to vibe with him on so much music, dude you are the truth. Thanks to my Bottom Street cohorts past, present and future. Thanks to my man Steven Carter for giving me my first copy of Fruity Loops which reignited this journey. Thanks to the Concrete Generation for allowing me to get down with y'all early and often. Special shout out to Bluz for putting me on to spoken word I can honestly say you are my mentor. A secondary shout out to Tavis "don't call me Silky" Brunson, though we rag on each other I appreciate you bruh and don't let this go to your head but you're one of my favorite poets. A third special shout out to LaShonda for listening to me at work and pushing me to touch my dreams and make them a reality. Last but not least thanks to everyone that has given me words of encouragement and support my art even when I don't if I forgot you don't worry there is more music on the way.


Look out for new tracks from me and my man 24K in the near future, also I am working on a new spoken word CD, I'll keep you posted.

Peace J

Friday, January 14, 2011

From Trash to Treasure

What's up good people,
                As I was going through some papers that I had "filed away", by that I mean were stacked together in a plastic bag in my room, I found a poem that I wrote on 12-19-2005. I know that seems to be such a long time ago, I had just recently graduated college in May of 2005 I had gotten my first "real" job in November of this same year and I was living in my first apartment. I don't really remember if I wrote this for anyone in particular but I read it and I like it, it may even make my next spoken word project. (I know what you're saying, do you have a first project, and surprisingly the answer is yes). In any event at this time in my artistic development I didn't title a lot of my poems and my reasoning at the time was something to the effect of, "I don't want my words to be confined in a box by a title" how lame was that? Most of my work didn't have titles because I could never think of anything creative enough and didn't like simply naming it using a line from out the poem, I wanted something deep, meaningful. In any event I will allow you guys to decide what this poem should be called you can leave comments on my Facebook wall or my email or here or my twitter (imallyg) if you want.

Mesmerized by an unidentified beauty
Highly identified as the one to seek
I seek thee first before the Kingdom of heaven
And that's blasphemous

So hallelujah to your amen and I'm not religious
I'm just a man mesmerized by a beauty
The Mother Mary must have seen with her eyes

Hypnotized by hypnotic eyes that keep me at bay
With their seductive stances
Glances that say more than words can manage

And maybe I'm day dreaming
Maybe I'm not
But I cannot get this woman out of my head
And into my car, plus

She's far too advanced for the far too
Simplistic advances of a man who
Puts too much Em-phasis on his
money or his car, she got both

Most don't know how to deal with a woman
who handles her own work because
They can't feed their own ego's
With the need of an insecure woman

Her insecurities came from the infidelity of her father
And that pushed her farther away from men
To the point she tried women for a change
But found when it comes to love

Men and women are much the same
So the games she play
Arose from the pain she saw
In her mother's crying eyes

So she sacrifices her body
To protect her heart
Rejected attempts to slip her
Defense Systems and touch her soul
Leaves Beauty with a
Cold, empty feeling

Despair displays daily
From her soul's windows
To the projection screens
Of anonymous individuals
That will never know her name

Beauty's brain games brought the beast soaring out her pores
Scarring scores of men with a mark that's
Undeniable and unforgettable
But Beauty's a survivor right,
Right?



Wednesday, January 12, 2011

New Year, New Poems and New Random BS

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!! I know its been way too long since I've posted stuff but I needed a sabbatical of sorts. (In other words, I didn't know what to write about) So I hope all your 2011 goals and dreams come true if you're working on making them reality. I didn't make any new years resolutions this year (well I made one, go to my Facebook page for more info on that) and I have good reason, we are all ever-changing, ever-evolving creatures therefore, resolutions are made daily, you're never the same person twice.

So my goal in the new year is to bring some new topics to this site along with some new poems and what better way to do that than to refer you to some of my old blogs on Myspace. Now I know what you're thinking, Myspace is still a functioning site? And surprisingly the answer is yes. So go to my page (I even made it easy to do all you have do is click on the link and you don't even have to log in) and read some of my blogs from 2005, 2006, 2007, 2008 & 2009. And while you're at it check out my other Myspace pages here and here and also check out my reverbnation page. But really I just wanted to say I'm going to write about the things that's important to me, music, poetry, sports, music, poetry, politics, music poetry, random nonsense, music and poetry. So for this entry I am posting a poem I wrote probably two or three years ago and I came across it as I was writing yesterday and thought I would share. It doesn't have a title but when I ran across it, it speaks to how I'm feeling at the moment and what I'm dealing with.

I have known loves like Langston Hughes has known rivers
The Euphrates, the Nile
I have known sorrows like the Mississippi
Love is ever changing but always staying the same
And I'm not equipped to handle this.
I mean I could handle this if
I never met her or I met her and she wasn't my other half
But I did and she is and, I'm supposed to be a man about it.
Does that mean I can't cry when my whole is divided by half and
I don't want to be broken again.
What I mean to say is I don't want to be open again,
Open to the possibility of being half the man I've grown to be
I've grown to see that it is easier to say we are broken than
I'm ill-repaired, I'm not together, but I'm getting there
Just like its easier to leave than to have an honest conversation
Because honestly, how many of us can be truthful with ourselves much less another person?
How much less of another person do we absorb before we begin to realize they are no good for us?
I'm guilty too, guilty of what all hopeless romantics are guilty of
Giving so much of ourselves that we've forgotten the things we want and need, Guilty of being in the need of love, guilty of loving someone who doesn't love us But love is ever changing and always staying the same,
until then I'll be waiting for her to come my way again

Hope you guys enjoy.